Should I Postpone My Wedding?

We know that many couples who had their spring weddings planned for March, April, and May of this year have had to postpone, cancel, or take their weddings virtual. But now what about those couples who have their weddings planned for summer, fall, or winter? Should they just scrap all their wedding plans? Should we just cancel all in-person weddings for 2020?

Saying it loud for the people in the back: ABSOLUTELY NOT!

2020 is far from over so thinking that people should be cancelling their weddings for the rest of the year (and in some people’s opinions - cancelling them until we get a COVID-19 vaccine) is a fatalistic way to view what is currently happening in the world. How about a little more optimism, people?

So what did I tell my client who, like the rest of us, is getting conflicting information about the state of events, weddings, and other gatherings for the rest of the year? Here’s what I advised regarding her wedding currently scheduled to take place in September 2020:

First, check in with yourself and your partner.

How are you all feeling about keeping your current wedding date? What feelings arise at the thought of you going on as planned until told otherwise? If you personally feel okay with things, acknowledge that and begin to have conversations with other important people.

Check in with your immediate families and your bridal party

How do they feel about you keeping the wedding date the same? What concerns do they have? Are they adamant about you postponing it? Open conversations with your immediate families will help give you some clarity about how to proceed becuase these are the people you absolutely must have at your celebration.

Check in with your venue.

I know some venues are holding hard positions when it comes to trying to change wedding dates. But, the good news - many are being incredibly understanding! Talk with your venue about the options for rescheduling the wedding. Gauge how flexible they are in terms of how much notice they need before rescheduling your original date. Ask them about the dates for the rest of 2020 - what do they have available, if anything. This conversation will allow you to understand in greater detail all your available options. The sooner you have a conversation with the venue, the better.

Okay, so now what?

After you’ve checked in with everyone above, it’s time for you to just wait. Seriously. There’s nothing left for you to do at the moment. You don’t want to jump to changing your wedding plans if you don’t have to, and right now, you don’t have to. With a wedding in September and beyond, you’ve got plenty of time to watch the situation. At the end of the day, the states will be the ones who determine the rules on gatherings so why move faster than them when it comes to making that decision? Do all your research on the options available to you and then move on to thinking about something else for a couple of months.

In addition to the recommendations above, for her specific September wedding, my advice was to have those conversations, know your options, and then wait for state guidance. If by mid/end of July, there is still no timeline as to when events can begin to take place, then it’ll be time to start the rescheduling process.

I know it’s not something you want to think about because you’ve spent so much time planning, but trust and believe patience is key when it comes to seeing this all through without stressing yourself too much. It’ll all work out beautifully in the end.